My bad brain

The binary thinker, on and off, black and white. No inbetween. Hardline: like being shot for raising a gun.

Had a great waffle, coffee and chat with "the wisest man I know" again. So sporadic are our meetings, its like we've got the world to talk about, all pent up.

We talked about past experiences, mistakes, judgements and just plain-old-human-nature. I think I mentioned it a while back that I operate in a very black and white way, its either for or against stance. Seems thats gotten me into trouble, burnt a few bridges too.

How does one shift a mindset, or a predisposed way of thinking into a new state? How can one unlearn something as intimate as your own thought processes? I meam to, but its gonna take time. And patience.

I was thinking the other day about the perception of time. A fly always manages to escape your slap, no matter how fast you move your hard, no matter how hellbent you are into seeing fly-splatter on the inside of your palm. They seem to have lightning quick reactions. Now, is it because their nervous systems are engineered for quick response (like a reports driven datasbase is architected to give speedy results), what if the Fly sees life a lot slower?

How many of you think your weeks are flying by faster than they used to? Is that because the neural pathways are getting pot-hole ridden? Our perception of time is worsening? Or its just another monday to sunday? I'm sure routine fits in there somewhere.

What if martial arts training (or any other quick reaction sport / game) is also training in slowing down ones perception of time? Is bullet-time even perceivable within ones existence? I'd like to think so.

Had a great round of mashie golf with my colleagues today. I love that buzz you get from hitting a ball with the perfect strike, it goes exactly where you intended. That's what keeps you coming back to the golf course. Sometimes I see that in life. Little idiosyncracies (sp?) that let you know you're human. Laughter, a smile from a stranger, being complimented, feeling appreciated, falling in love. I live for that.

You look more delectable tonight than ever before. Hair neatly tied back with one strand of your rich brown hair danlged over the left side of your face, angling down to your sultry mouth. Eyes half closed, cute little nose (Maxi Jazz says it best). Fire behind your eyes, burning for me. Your healthy skin from your exposed shoulder seems to glow, all the way up to the base of your ear, your neck surely defines the best lines ever conceived. You're exuding confidence tonight, professional, the queen amongst the drones, a wave along a beach teasing the sand in your wake. You move through the people with a flare, I can read your inner passion. I smile, knowing that you can read mine too. You are mine and I am yours. I want to be selfish, I want you all to myself, but such beauty caged is criminal. You are that drifting-on-the-air bee-eater, perched on my hand. I want to take pictures, but there is no need. You'll always be in my mind, so vividly fetching.